From The little book of famous insults

Or how to burn a troll on your blog.

You never open your mouth without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge.

… is a self-made man who worships his creator.

I am willing to love all mankind, except …

He is the greatest … in the world and is nothing to brag about.

He’s turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he’s miserable and depressed.

There’s less here than meets the eye.

He is a sheep in sheep’s clothing.

His mind is so open the wind whistles through it.

He can’t see a belt without hitting below it.

Tell me if you had to do it all over, would you fall in love with yourself again?

You must have taken great pains; you could not naturally have been so very stupid.

A healthy male adult bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people’s patience.

… occasionally stumbles over the truth, but he always hastily picks himself up and hurries on as if nothing had happened.

The great thing about … is you don’t have to think. He takes a position and you automatically take the opposite one and you know you’re right.

He has been called a mediocre man; but this is unwarranted flattery.

His limitations are limitless.

You’re obviously suffering from delusions of adequacy.

When you get home throw your mother a bone.

He’s a taker, boring and insincere, but outside of that, I like him.

If brains were butter you couldn’t grease a pan.

A person with your low intelligence should have a voice to match.

The trouble with … is that he is suffering from halitosis of the intellect. That’s presuming … has an intellect.